Spending Time with your Spouse
Can Change your Marriage
By: Raychel Chumley
Let me ask you a question, “How often do you spend time alone with your spouse?” Spending time with your spouse can change your marriage. If you are like most couples (myself included) your answer is probably “Not much.” Many couples spend time with friends or family if they go out at all and very few spend quality time together alone. Today I want to tell you something important. Spending time alone with your spouse can change your marriage.
You might be thinking, “Why is this important?” Well, let me tell you why. How much time you spend together just the two of you is directly linked to other important aspects of your relationship like: communication, friendship, emotional connection, and sexual intimacy…to name a few. This is not something to take lightly!
I want to share with you three ways to spend time with your spouse that you will want to start implementing into your relationship TODAY.
- Every Day Connections- Aim to spend at least 10 minutes every day (preferably 20-30 minutes if you can) of one-on-on time together. Talk about your day, what exciting things happened, family updates, etc. Make sure to include the next day’s agenda and any scheduling changes, conflicts, or events. This might sound easy but in reality it can be incredibly difficult. You have to make this time a priority. (this is one of my marriage goals!)
- Dates- You have heard it a million times but you need to hear it again. Don’t just go out with friends when you have your dates but plan a few to just be the two of you. But, here are two ground rules to remember for these “alone” date nights.
- Keep it light! Focus on enjoying each other’s company. This is not the time to discuss any marital strife or family difficulty. Focus on smiling, laughing, holding hands and having a good time.
- Plan ahead. If there is some conflict or difficult issue you need to discuss plan a night specifically for that conversation to happen. Don’t plan a lovely dinner out and then halfway through appetizers say, “We need to talk.” NOBODY likes that conversation starter! Give each other time to prepare and have the conversation when all parties are willing and ready.
- Extended Dates and Getaways- Every few months plan an extended date or getaway. It can be as small as a full day away together or as big as a romantic vacation for two for as long as you can! The point is to get out of your daily surroundings and spend some quality time together. Get creative! It doesn’t have to be expensive or exotic…just go!
Spending time with your spouse together is so important for you relationship. Don’t neglect it! Next week I’m going to share with you some fantastic/funny/thought-provoking/creative conversation starters and questions to ask each other during your time together. Cuz, I know some of you are starting to panic thinking…”What are we going to talk about?!”
Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered. So, don’t forget to tune in next week for another edition of the Monday Marriage Minute.
Please leave your comments below. I would love to hear from you!